August 17th, 2007 | 7 Comments
Public tantrums, hitting, biting, talking back…
If this sounds like a typical day for you, then pick up The No-Cry Discipline Solution: Gentle Ways to Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Tantrums, and Tears, by parent educator, Elizabeth Pantley.
After helping countless parents find ways to get their babies and toddlers to go to sleep without tears, Pantley turns her sites to a holistic, yet practical approach to parenting.
First assuring readers that we are doing great if we feel good about our choices 70% of the time (phew!), Pantley then lifts a good deal of stress from our shoulders and provides a new perspective on the issues.
According to Pantley, it is important to remember that no matter how embarrassing, upsetting, or stressful your child’s behavior is, it is not about you. Ultimately, discipline problems boil down to your child’s difficulty in controlling his or overwhelming emotions.
Pantley then takes you step by step through how to plan ahead, address the underlying issues, and help your child cope so that you can guide your child in becoming a well-adjusted young person (and also enjoy parenting more).
By using hundreds of test families, Pantley is able to find out which solutions really work for actual flesh and blood families. She finds results and then uses her theories to explain them, rather than developing abstract theories and expecting you to figure out how to apply them.
If you’ve been reading up on parenting advice, many of the suggestions will be familiar–offering choices and redirecting a child’s attention are not new techniques. However, there is some advice that was fresh for me. For example, if your child hurts someone else, focus initially on making the wounded party feel better, rather than provide your child with attention to reinforce the negative behavior. Most parents should find at least a couple of new ideas.
Finally, Pantley provides examples of common discipline issues (won’t take a bath, won’t leave fun places, throws tantrums at stores, etc.) and suggestions about how to deal with each one.
Pantley assembles all these supportive thoughts, well-researched techniques, and helpful ideas, in one reference and provides a framework for parenting with loving and respectful discipline.
You can tell that Pantley really delights in being a mother, and that her love of parenting extends to the children and parents of the world, as well. She genuinely wants to help us find ways to share that joy. With so many negative stories in the news about parenting, it is refreshing to hear from an author who sees parenting as a pleasure and provides practical and uplifting advice so that we can spend less time fighting bad behavior and more time cherishing beautiful experiences.
Need a copy right now?
The No-Cry Discipline Solution is available for purchase…and check out more tips and videos from Pantley.
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